"The enormous amount of cash seized at my home is not so-called "drug money." These are and were secret funds of the political party used for the Mexican presidential campaign, to buy weapons and finance terrorist activities."

Translated from El Universal (Mexico): The Mexico City daily is publishing the missive from the reputed Sino-Mexican designer-drug precursor mogul — or Mongol, given that the shipments reportedly originated from Mongolia — in two daily installments.

Could this get more interesting?

Remember, this is a [draft-quality]] retranslation of the Spanish translation of a letter that may, judging from the reported title, have been written in comprehensible but somewhat broken English. I have been searching in vain for the English-language original. Have gotten a copy yet? People who get paid to gather news full-time, say?

To whom it may concern, it begins:

In May 2006 a client we have just met from another city was interested in our company and wanted to meet. We had an appointment at 4:30 pm, but he rescheduled for two hours later because of traffic. He arrived with another man and a woman that evening, around 7:30 pm, well-dressed. He spoke with me alone in my conference room and say I was very famous in the pharmaceuticals industry. Everyone knew I have literally rebuilding the industry on a large scale in Mexico and he was very pleased to meet such a young and promising businessman. He also said he hoped I would do my best for Mexico; ["]now is the best moment to make an intelligent choice of the best person to be Mexican president and I how you will be able to provide the same enthusiasm as two years ago in helping the PAN party be re-elected; during that time you were not just an honorary senator of that party but a cause supported strongly by our government. You know the economy and politics are like two shoes in a pair that must always match," and so on in that manner.

At first I thought he wanted support for his party with money because in the last two years I had made an effort to help out the successful bid by the PRI for the governorship of Veracruz. For that reason I was named honorary senator for the PRI and have the credentials with me, and everyone, including my Chinese and U.S. customers, knew I was an honorary Mexican senator. He I aksed him how much support he needed, he said to me: "Our party, PAN, has a lot of money; We only ask that you cooperate with us. I asked him how I could cooperate and he said it was just like dancing: One step at a time. Among other things, but I got confused because my Spanish is not good enough to understand the gist of it. When he noticed I looked perplexed, he looked meaningfully, as if giving an order, at his aide in the other room, to bring in two suitcases [briefcases? I think suitcases.] I opened one and it was full of $100 bills. I was startled: I said nothing and looked at him with some mistrust. "Because you know our faces and our secret, you have only two options: Cooperate or we will chop off your head. There is no third option. You are not only risking your own life but also that of your wife and two children because we known what they do and where they are every minute, so please make your decision carefully." In those circumstances, I had no other option but to cooperate. I asked what I had to do and whether it was dangerous. He said there was absolutely no danger. "Just keep this money for us in your house."

I said there was no way I was going to keep the money at my house because my wife and children were in the house. He said they were not home at the moment and would not return yet because they were eating at the restaurant belonging to my family. They knew everything and I had no option but to do as they wished.

And so on. Quite a tale. Part II is due to be published in Spanish translation today.